How to Help a Family With Childhood Cancer, Printable Guide for Friends, Grandparents and Coworkers, What to Say, Meal and Ride Calendar

How to Show Up for a Family Going Through Childhood Cancer
A guide for grandparents, friends, coworkers, church family and neighbors. 17 pages.
Part of Through Treatment, Together.

When a child is diagnosed with cancer, the people who love the family often freeze. You want to help, but you're afraid of saying the wrong thing, getting in the way, or bringing germs to a child who can't afford them. So you wait to be asked and most families never ask. This guide shows you what families in treatment wish you knew, what to say and what to skip, how to visit safely and how to help in ways that don't need asking. It also helps you remember the brothers and sisters and the grandparents and keep showing up through the long middle months.

A gentle introduction on every page. Each one explains, in a few soft lines, why the page matters, grounded in respected work, including David Kessler's guidance on what to say (and not say) to people in pain, The Dougy Center's guidance for families facing a serious illness and Dr. Heidi Horsley's work on siblings.

WHAT'S INSIDE (17 PAGES)

Start Here
• A personal note from me, then a note for you and how to use this guide

What Helps
• What families in treatment wish you knew
• Words that help and words to skip (with a "try this instead" table: no "everything happens for a reason," "stay positive," comparisons or medical advice)
• Germ-safe visiting and the rules on the hospital door sign
• Help that doesn't need asking: meals, rides, sibling care, laundry, gas cards, parking money
• My "I will do this" plan (fill-in)
• A meal and ride calendar for the fridge or the group chat

The Whole Family
• Showing up for the brothers and sisters
• Showing up for the grandparents and both parents

The Long Haul
• The long middle months: a simple rhythm, scan days and dates to put in your phone
• Cards and texts that need no reply
• Fundraisers done kindly: ask first, protect their privacy

For You
• Your own feelings (with Ring Theory: comfort in, venting out)

At the end
• Find your circle: organizations that help childhood cancer families
• A thank-you page with a 25% off code

WHAT YOU'LL RECEIVE
5 PDF files, 17 pages each:
• Fillable – US Letter (type right on the pages on a computer, tablet or phone)
• Full color – US Letter (8.5 x 11 in)
• Full color – A4
• Printer-friendly (white background, saves ink) – US Letter
• Printer-friendly – A4

WHO IT'S FOR
• Grandparents, aunts, uncles, close friends, neighbors and church family of a child in cancer treatment
• Coworkers and managers supporting a parent whose child has cancer
• Families who want one thing to hand the people asking "What can I do?"
• Care coordinators, meal-train organizers, church ministries and school PTAs

HOW IT WORKS
• This is a digital download. Nothing will be shipped to you.
• After checkout, your files appear under You > Purchases and Reviews on Etsy and in your Etsy confirmation email.
• Print at home or at a local print shop, or type right into the fillable file on a computer, tablet or phone.
• The fillable file works best in the free Adobe Acrobat Reader (on a computer, tablet or phone). Other PDF apps may not save typing and some rating circles may let you pick more than one answer. To write by hand on a tablet, open any version in an app like GoodNotes or Notability.
• Print a single page or the whole guide, as many times as you need for your own personal use.

A GIFT FOR THE PEOPLE WHO WANT TO HELP
Buying for someone else? Send this download to a friend, a grandparent, a church group or a coworker who wants to show up well. It's also a kind thing for a family's closest person to share with everyone else, so the family doesn't have to explain what they need.

A NOTE FROM ME
Hi, I'm Niki. I'm a mom and a certified grief educator. My daughter Harper was diagnosed with osteosarcoma at fifteen and our family spent about three and a half years in treatment. The people who carried us didn't have magic words. They brought gas cards and meals, sent texts that asked how we were holding up and kept showing up when things got quiet. This guide is everything I'd want those people to know.

Real tears. Real love.
Harper's Heart Press

PLEASE NOTE
• This guide is a gentle companion. It is not medical advice and is not a substitute for the family's care team or a licensed professional. Always follow the family's and their care team's instructions about visiting, germs and food.
• If you are in crisis, call or text 988 (U.S.) or your local emergency number.
• Published sources are credited by name. Harper's Heart Press is not affiliated with or endorsed by any of the authors or organizations named.
• For personal use only. Please don't share, resell, or redistribute the files. Churches, workplaces, hospitals and support organizations: please message me about group licensing.
• Because this is a digital file, returns and exchanges aren't accepted. If anything is wrong with your download, message me and I'll make it right.

MORE FROM THROUGH TREATMENT, TOGETHER
• Get them all: Through Treatment, Together: The Complete Pack. All 7 books (Start Here, the parent journal, My Brave Days, My Treatment Adventure Book, You're Stronger Than You Think, Me Too and How to Show Up) plus the 4 hospital printables, for $49.55. Find it in the Cancer Families section of my shop.
• Me Too: a sibling's book for brothers and sisters, ages 3-17, during cancer treatment
• Hospital printables: a door sign for visitors, packing lists, a countdown to the last treatment and a Last Day of Treatment certificate (or all four in a bundle)